MATCHING GRANT - $5,000!!

Our adoption is moving right along, maybe even slightly faster than we had anticipated. And we're grateful as it does seem that we'll have Conlan home by the end of May! We've been completely blown away by the level of support from family and friends and want to thank everyone who has supported us in prayer and financially.

We have more amazing news! Lifesong for Orphans and Chosen & Dearly Loved have committed an Adoption Matching Grant of $5,000 to help pay our adoption expenses!! We could hardly believe the generosity of this gift!! Will you please prayerfully consider making a tax-deductible donation to help us meet this matching grant to help bring Conlan home? Our goal date is January 31, 2016, but funds will be accepted towards our adoption until our adoption is complete. You can choose to give via check or online.

Mail-in: Please make checks payable to “Lifesong for Orphans.” In the memo, note “Family Acct Number: 5711 & Family Name: Pugh” to assure it goes to the correct account. Please mail to Lifesong for Orphans, PO Box 40, Gridley, IL 61744.

Online: Go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate. Select “Give to an Adoptive Family.” Complete the online form and fill in “Family Account Number: 5711” and “Family Name: Pugh” Fields. (Please note that PayPal will charge an administrative fee: 2.2% + $.30 USD per transaction. Your donation will be decreased by the amount of this fee. We totally understand the convenience of this option and aren't concerned about this admin fee.)

Legal stuff Lifesong would like us to share: Lifesong has been blessed with a partner that underwrites all U.S. administrative and fund-raising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners) and 100% of your donation goes directly to the adoption. In following IRS guidelines, your donation is to the named non-profit organization and it retains full discretion over its use, but intends to honor the donor’s suggested use. Individual donations of $250 or more and yearly donations totaling $250 or more will receive a tax-deductible receipt. Receipts for donations under $250 will gladly be sent upon request. Lifesong is a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization.

Fingerprinting success!

You guys...today was amazing.

We submitted our I-800A application to the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services on 9/21/15 and were told that it would take 60-90 days to hear back. WELL, we heard back today! In the mail, we received our fingerprint appointment date, scheduled for 10/28/15. I've heard that some people have had success just walking in and shaving off a week or two from the waiting process. Others, however, have been grumbled at and turned away.

After a bit of discussion, Nathan and I decided to give it a go. We drove to downtown SLC, entered the building (which did not have a ramp for Lachlan's wheelchair, so we had to carry his chair up a flight of stairs) and headed to the office. I had butterflies, wondering what would happen. The security guards were intrigued by Lachlan's suction machine and kept Nathan's two pocket knives, but eventually let us through with smiles, directing us to where we needed to go.

Initially, I thought we were setting ourselves up for disaster because there were no less than 50 people in the waiting room. AY! But, my fears were dismissed when the guard explained that there was a citizenship ceremony that day and many families and friends were present to celebrate. Wow! What a beautiful thing to witness!

Thankfully, there was only 1 other person in the fingerprinting office. I started chatting with the receptionist right away as if she would not notice we were 10 days early for our appointment. But it wouldn't have mattered...she just stamped our documents and got us started with the proceedings! I was SHOCKED! She was very friendly (no grumbling as I had feared) and the entire process took no more than 30 minutes for both Nathan and I. AND, Lachlan was very well-behaved!

From here, we can expect to receive email approval in the next week or so and then our hard copy within a few weeks. After that, we'll notarize the approval, get it state authenticated and send it off to our adoption agency which will then send it to the Chinese Consulate in D.C. Right now, we're still on Steps 3 & 4 on our little timeline graphic, but we're getting closer to hopping to the big Step 7!

!!!!!!!!!!

I cannot tell you how encouraged I am by all of this. It means that our expected travel time frame of of May-ish is totally realistic. When we get to December, things get a little harder due to various staffers' holiday breaks, so the more we can get accomplished before then, the better!

We are not promised that this will be an easy journey (quite the opposite, actually), so our biggest prayer is that God will work on our hearts' trust and contentment. However, this went better than expected, so I want to shout gratitude from the rooftops!

We're trying our best, Conlan! We'll be together soon :)

Family isn't complete with out L

Lachlan's Sunday School class talked about family today and how important each family member is. I was helping in class and aided Lachlan's drawing efforts via hand-over-hand as he name off each family member. Want to guess who is favorite family member is??

Doting dad?

Nurturing mama?

Cool Conlan?

Nope...Lachlan is Lachlan's favorite :) LOL! "Lachlan! I love Lachlan!"

Also, this is a sheep. Craft time with 4-year-olds is a hoot!

Dossier Documents: SLC>YVR

We have our Utah & Indiana dossier documents state-authenticated, so Lachlan and I got to spend some time at FedEx/Kinkos making copies and getting them shipped off to our placement agency in Vancouver, WA!

This is a big step, though we're still waiting for one Nevada document (our home study agency is located there and the document was notarized in that state, so it has to be state-authenticated there as well). We're told NV is back-logged several weeks, so it could be up to a month before we receive it.

I'm not totally distraught as we will likely be waiting until early December for the very final dossier document: our United States Citizen and Immigration Services fingerprinting approval. If you check out this little flow chart, you can see that we're on steps 3&4 concurrently. That's sort of wild for me to see as we feel like we've put a ton of work into this process so far and we're only on those steps?!?! But I hear things go really fast after step 8, so here's to being thankful and prayerful along the ride :)

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival!

I sometimes joke that I wish I were Jewish by heritage because I love the cultural emphasis on family and tradition. Though our preparation and education of the Chinese culture, I've recently started to realize that we have the amazing opportunity to bring beautiful Chinese celebrations into our home.

The Mid-Autumn Festival is centered around prayer, friends and family and thanksgiving. The harvest festival is held on the full moon between late September and October and dates back to the Shang Dynasty 16th-10th century BC. Traditionally, the celebration has been centered around moon worship as the waxing and waning of the moon is reminiscent of a woman's monthly cycle and that of pregnancy and birth (full moon = pregnant lady, crescent moon = giving birth).

These days, lanterns and moon cakes are staples of the celebration -- beautiful paper lanterns and yummy desserts?! Count me in!

I'm thankful for my college friend Wei who, nearly 10 years ago, introduced me to the Mid-Autumn Festival. Who knew she'd be a source of inspiration for Nathan and I choosing to adopt from China and a continued resource as we learn more about our little one's culture?! I'm grateful for you, Wei, and look forward to the beautiful moments your family will experience in the coming months.

(photos from 2007)

Welcome, friends!

I think I'm finally braving-up and sharing this thing. Thanks for caring :)

Why is Adoption So Expensive

Our adoption is estimated to cost $40,000. **Cue the record scratch.**

I know, right. It’s a hefty sum. But here’s the deal, China is not trying to extort money from my family and we’re not “buying” our child (please learn to not say this to an adoptive family – it’s not true and it’s an awful, illegal concept).

Each dollar we are spending on this adoption is tied to a specific cost and it basically boils down to (1) Home Study, Fingerprinting & Document Charges, (2) Agency and Legal Fees and (3) Travel and Accommodations. I just read a short-but-thorough blog post about this subject – will you please click that link and read it? And pretty please leave a comment here if you learned anything??

Why is Adoption So Expensive by Meg H Miller

Thanks as always for supporting us in bringing home our little one. If you care to help us financially, we would absolutely love your help as we work toward our $4,000 matching grant goal on our Brittany’s Hope Seedling Gift site.

PA & Brotherly Love

When I was researching various aspects of the adoption process, I kept running across the acronym "PA." But when I googled "PA + adoption," wouldn't you know, all the results were about Pennsylvania adoption agencies and legalities! Haha!

Turns out it stands for Pre-Approval and we officially have ours! China has deemed us worthy of considering to be our little boy's parents. One step closer to a family of four!

Dossier Deforestation

Adoption is beautiful. It gives children the opportunity to know love and family and stability. It also destroys entire forests in no time flat. THE PAPERWORK PROCESS IS NUTSO.

Part of the adoption process includes sending a dossier, a packet of information all about our family, our finances, our psychological state, our criminal background and more, to China as they determine if we're fit to parent our newest little one.

Each piece of the 17-document report must be notarized and then "state-certified" in the state that the document originated. So, we had to order new, certified copies of our birth certificates and marriage certificates from Indiana only to put them back in the mail for Indiana's Secretary of State to stamp a seal of authentication.

Then, we had to ask our home study agency to sign an agreement from our placement agency and have that notarized. It was mailed to us and then we had to put it back in the mail, bound for Nevada as the home study agency is located in there and needs that state's authentication.

The other 13 documents originated in Utah, so I dropped them off at the Lt. Gov's office on Monday and then got a great phone call a few days later letting me know the documents were ready! On Friday, Lachlan and I made the trip up to the State House pick up those precious pages that get us a little closer to Little Brother.

And while Indiana is awesome and doesn't charge for this service, Nevada charges $20 per document and Utah charges $15 per document. So, that was a $215 process (good thing I coupon in order to get my reams of paper for free!).

I'm pretty sure need to plant a few trees to offset both the document paper used as well as the checks I've been writing ;)

Brittany's Hope Matching Grant!

Wonderful news! Our family has officially been approved for a Brittany's Hope adoption matching grant! We just have to raise $4,000 from family and friends and Brittany's Hope will match that dollar-for-dollar! And each donation is 100% tax-deductible! Winner winner, Chinese dinner!

Will you please consider heading over to our Seedling Gift page and donating? To quote Lachlan's current favorite saying:

(seriously, he says this all the time and it's HI-liarious!)

Granting Favor

Seven grant applications submitted via postal mail and two via the web today! Praying that we get some good news in the next 3 months or so :)

Home Study Approved!!

We are in Vernal on a little Grandparent-Dinosaur-Getaway and just received wonderful news! Our HOME STUDY WAS APPROVED!

(clearly, this is our photo and I absolutely did not steal this image from Google)

Now we can submit our application to immigration for fingerprinting. And it's the biggest component for our dossier. ALSO, I can finally apply for grants as they all require copies of our approved home study.

Adoption Acronyms

Here's a handy list of adoption acronyms specifically related to China adoptions. I copied and pasted it from a China Adoption FB page, so I can't take credit :)

1. HS - Home Study
2. I-800A - Application to USCIS to adopt a child from China
3. I-797 - Notice Of Action I-800A approval
4. DTA - Dossier To Agency
5. DTC - Dossier to China
6. LID - Logged In Date
7. OOT - Out Of Translation - dossier has been translated into Chinese and is "in progress"
8. LOI - Letter of Intent
9. PA - Pre-Approval
10. LOA - Letter Of Acceptance also called LSC (Letter Seeking Confirmation)
11. I-800 - Application to adopt a specific child from China
12. A5 or Article 5 - Final approval from the United States for the adoption to take place
13. TA - Travel Approval
14. Gotcha Day - A day like no other
15. CA - US Consulate Appointment in China

SW - Social Worker
WC - Waiting Child
AP - Adoptive Parent
SF - Special Focus
SN - Special Needs
NSN - Non Special Needs
PAP - Pre Adoptive Parent
USCIS - United States Citizenship and Immigration Services
NVC - National Visa Center
CCCWA China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption
SWI - Social Welfare Institution
CWI - Child Welfare Institution

Dossier - a series of documents, that you compile, that tells the CCCWA about you, your family, your health and your finances

Cabled - where the NVC sends the Embassy in Guangzhou notice that the I800 has been approved, so that once the agency's person in Guangzhou takes the family's DS230 paperwork (the paperwork for the child's American visa to be created) to the Embassy they can match it with the cable of approval to start the Article 5 process.

What's in a Name?

People always say English is a complex language and I'd agree... But, wow, Mandarin isn't exactly a cakewalk.

Thankfully, my dear friend Wei has offered to be a resource as we forge our way through translations and cultural nuances. Today, she gave us the gift of learning our son's name meaning. And while I can't share his Chinese name, I'm thrilled to share the meaning of each of his name characters:

Surname: Sun

Middle: Harmonious

Given: Friend

In this case, dear Shakespeare, I'd say a lot. Because, wouldn't you know, Nathan's middle name means Harmony. Yet another beautiful thread in this precious tapestry of our family story.

WE'RE MATCHED!!

The story is already so beautiful and I need to do it justice by writing the whole thing out in a coherent fashion. But for now, let it be known that WE HAVE BEEN MATCHED WITH OUR SON!!

We thought for sure we'd be adopting a little girl, but we came across a sweet, 2-year-old boy a few weeks ago who has captured our hearts. I'm not permitted to share his name, photo or information in public domains (like this blog), but you should know he's completely adorable and quite the fit for our family.

He's the one I mentioned in a previous post, a post where I was having major angst about being drawn to this sweet kiddo, yet hearing significant concerns and questions from our international pediatrician. All concerns were settled a few days ago, but we wanted to take time to prayerfully consider what would be the best for this little boy...would our family serve him in the way he absolutely deserves?

And we said YES! We're so honored to be matched with this precious boy and humbled to be his parents.

It's going to be a long 9 months :)

Unknown, cherished

It's been a over a week since I've posted, but I just felt like I couldn't. I could've talked about the psychologist appointment Nathan and I had today as per dossier requirements. I could've mentioned the fact that we finished everything due on our end of the Home Study and that we're just waiting for reference letters and the social worker. I could've said that we're completing as much of the dossier as possible without encroaching on the strange "date-window" where the documents can't be more than 5-6 months within the date of the total dossier submission. But, none of that matters comparatively...

On August 12th, I saw a pair of beautiful brown eyes that have crept into my thoughts of every waking hour since. This little boy with dark brown hair and a precocious grin has consumed my dreams of becoming a mama...again...

Last Friday we sent his information off to an international pediatrician who replied within hours asking for more information to give his best assessment as to this little boy's prognosis. Granted, I haven't cared as much about his assertions as I probably should. Hasn't Lachlan defied all the predictions made about him...against him? Why wouldn't this sweet boy from Hengyang, China be any different with a home full of love and a two parents completed devoted (not to mention a kickass big brother)?

Tonight, we got a call from our local, beloved ENT who reviewed his files. He gave honest, yet encouraging assessments. We also finally heard back from the orphanage with photos, current measurements and updated developmental information. It was one hour chock-full of information I've been waiting for since 10 o'clock last Friday...nearly a week! Now, we just pass this information back to the international pediatrician and wait for his updated response.

I have no doubt the doc will be skeptical...despite (or, perhaps, because of) adopting 3 children from China. However, it's up to Nathan and I to decide what's right for our family, knowing that God is in control.

If this whole process were up to me, I'd be fighting tooth and nail for this child. He's had my heart from the moment I laid eyes on him. But I'm confident that God has his story in place, as well as mine. If our tales could intertwine, it would be a joy and privilege. If He has another family in mind for this sweet boy, well, blessed are they.

For now, I'm thankful for what I've seen in the medical notes and updates. I'm confident  this boy has quite a future in store for him and he will always have someone advocating and praying for him in me. Continue on, cherished boy. You are loved and have a life of influence, joy and love in store for you. I will always root for you, whether near or far.

Home Study Duties Completed!

Our portion is done! More waiting for others :) Still in limbo: social worker visits, child abuse clearances, reference letters to be received and of course the final report. But for now, I celebrate!!

Dossier & Family

Well, Little One, you are way loved! There are so many safeguards in place to protect you and ensure you're entering a loving, secure home. That equates to a ton of paperwork and running around on our part...and you're worth it!

I spoke with AGCI about the dossier process today and it's a bit trickier than I predicted. It's going to mean that we ask various professionals including, doctors, psychologists and employers to get paperwork notarized on their own. It means that I have to just nod my head for now, knowing I don't fully understand the process, but that the agency will hold my hand as we get the point where I need to act. It means I continue to pray, remembering that I'm not in control and it's best that way.

I'm feeling a little overwhelmed today. Our the home study requires over 20 hours of adoption education. I've taken so. many. hours. of education today and have been tested. So far I've passed 3 test and am waiting to hear back on five more. My eyes have been opened as a result of the testing and the essay-style testing. Hardcore, y'all. But it's good and I choose to remain grateful rather than view it as a barrier between bringing my little girl home...obviously I've done some reflecting and praying on this subject :) With all that said, I remain optimistic and excited!!


Little One, we went as a family to Lachlan's final horse therapy for the season today. Will you benefit from horse therapy? If so, we'll make sure you have it. If not, guess what? Our speech therapist does sibling rides and will ensure you have the chance to ride a horse if you so desire. We will make sure you have what you need to grow and thrive. And we told a bunch of family and close friends about our pursuit of you. Many people are praying for you now...please know that you are loved deeply already. We think of you an pray for you constantly. We look forward to your homecoming.

Dossier process begins!

I just got off the phone with Julie at AGCI and we're starting the dossier process! Additionally, she sent the link for the Adoption Education classes, nearly 20 hours of courses covering a variety of topics.

I guess my late-night Parenthood binge-watching will be halted for a bit :) HA. Irony.

And maybe we'll soon announce that we're adopting?!!?!?!?! Ahhhhhhh! This was the point that I wanted to get to before telling the world...and now we're here?! I'm excited, but also feel strange that this is such a long journey. Will people get that? Well, I guess they'll learn alongside me, right?

Thank you, Lord, for bringing us to this point!

And a short note for our kiddo...

Little one, we went to the zoo today and I thought about you no less than a dozen times. I am so excited to share these moments with you, to teach you, to watch you and your brother interact. Today he loved the Cavy and the Green Tree Monitor best. So obscure! What will you enjoy observing? What will be your favorite? Will you like to ride the carousel or just watch it endlessly like Lachlan? I can't wait to learn. I love you.

Whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks...

...I will be right here waiting for you. (while I ensure, for the thousandth time that my ringer is on high and feverishly hit refresh on my inbox)

You know, just channeling my inner Richard Marx while being a bit melodramatic.

Learning to be patient is so hard, dang it! It's not like you just pray for the gift of patience and it comes floating from heaven on a soft cloud, ribbon-tied. Nope... It comes in the form of waiting for people to call back. Waiting for people to get back from vacations (how dare they take time off work?! haha). Waiting for the system.

Both of my main points-of-contact for the adoption agency and our home study agency are out of the office this week. I've filled out all the papers and submitted all the things... but I'm in a holding pattern and me no likey! I wanna get this show on the road. I think I just need to copy the HTML code for this post because I predict that the whole adoption journey is one big (loving, awesome, beautiful) waiting game.

I like how this verse below repeats itself, as if knowing I need to be told more than once so I might retain! HA!

Psalm 27:14 - Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

Announcement Soon?

All God's Children International should be approving our application any day now (they'll receive our first payment tomorrow). I'm so excited to share with the world that we're expanding our family and keep wondering how we will do so?! We have a family photo that we'll share on social media, but I don't know how I'll word it all?! So exciting and fun to think about!

On a heavier note, my heart and faith have been tested a few times over the last several days and I'm so thankful that God always meets us in these moments of heartache. His word says that we should cast our burdens upon the Lord and He'll sustain us (Psalm 55). When I can submit, forgive or do any other action that is the opposite of being controlling (please tell me I'm not the only one who wants to be the boss of it all), that is outside of me and my naturally inclinations. It doesn't come easily and is only possible by the grace of God. I'm thankful for those pains -- it reminds me Who has my life in His mighty hand.

Little One, please know we pray for you every day and that we are also praying that God transforms us into His likeness so that we can be better parents for you. We love you more than you know.

First notary visit

Today the adoption agency paperwork was notarized and submitted! One step closer to our child. (let it be known that I forgot my ID on the first trip to the bank...I always seem to mess up the good stuff. Thankfully, God always seems to work through my mistakes :) ). Now we move forward with the home study & dossier business!

We pray for you every night, little one. Tonight your Daddy prayed that you knew we were searching for you. I pray the same...comfort, peace and knowing that you are loved beyond measure.

Agency Orientation Packet being notarized...many, many pages, but only the beginning of the fun!

Application Submitted!

We submitted our adoption application this evening, providing family, health and legal background and information. We also indicated our countries of interest and that we're interested in pursuing a child who has special needs.

And so our adventure begins!